Close Calls

"I had some close calls when I was little," Stefanie began.

She, Jacob and I had driven out to Maryland to go hiking on Sugarloaf. We had a really excellent hike, during which we determined that we bore an uncanny resemblance to J.R.R. Tolkien characters (Jacob being the gollum to our hobbits, leading the way and egging us onward while we insisted on stopping every fifteen minutes for second breakfasts and "onesies").

As we were leaving the park, we waxed poetic about camping, and how much we miss it. Stefanie recalled that when she was six weeks old, her parents took her camping. But as she was six weeks early as a baby, it was really like they took a newborn camping. This spurred a few more one-liner stories about Stefanie's childhood almost-mishaps.

"When I was six months old, my parents were eating cantaloupe and I cried until they gave me a piece. Apparently I sucked on it for hours."

"When I was one year old, I choked on a piece of sausage."

"When I was two years old, I rolled out of a trailer and barely missed hitting my head on a stump."


How the girl made it to see 25, I'll never know.